·
A quarter of an hour passed as I walked along in
the dark where the street lights shun orange overhead among the footpath. I
stopped shortly underneath a broken, unlit street light. My phone vibrated. I
picked it out of my back pocket. The light from the phone illuminated my face
in the dark, pressing the button that unlocked my phone. I received a text
message. I sighed depressingly as my mouth frowned with disappointment. My mood
slightly altered a little bit. A text message from my deadbeat dad. One click
of the button opened the message in which I read it. My mouth parted to inhale a
long second of breath into my lungs. Fingers squeezed around the phone as I bit
my jaws together. Throwing away my phone to the concrete ground with a loud
grunt that woke up the neighbourhood. My phone now smashed to bits.
·
“THAT SON OF A BITCH!! How could he?! Who does
he think he is?!” A fire burnt its way inside my chest. My breathing
intensified. The shoulders grew stiff. My fingernails were digging deep into my
palms. Another grunt launched itself out of my throat in which I screamed to
the darkness around me. Kicking the remains of my broken phone case into the
dark. I closed my eyes for a moment, rose my head up into the air, and counted
the number of beats of my heart. I pictured myself now on the silent cruise
across the Atlantic Ocean where the waves would whip the ship softly and rock
me to sleep as I would lay there out in the sun with a glowing tan.
·
3…2…1, I counted back in my head. My fingers
would slowly coil away and loosen their way out of my palms until the muscles
in my body would end up calm. This way I wouldn’t let him win, that I wouldn't
give him the satisfaction that he wanted. As soon as my thoughts lingered to
that escapable dimension, the echoes inside my chest whispered in silence to me.
I felt relaxed and at peace, opening my eyes once again.
·
If life has taught me one thing, it is that being
angry all the time and frustrated is a waste of good energy, just like my
deadbeat dad who’s already done that. Ever since my mother left him he has
never been the same again. Always so miserable and depressed. Always trying to
drag me down with him in the same boat. My life and my choices are my own, not
for him to control anymore. It’s past time I reminded him of that.
·
Luckily there was a cool breeze that quieted my
rage inside me, and let loose the restraints that was holding me. I look at my
watch. 7:20pm. I was getting late. Then I looked towards the smashed pieces of my
phone. The battery and sim card was intact. I bent down and crouched to
retrieve it, and placed it in the back of my pants pocket. My whole body shuck
from the cold temperature in the air. My arms were shaking. I could see the fogginess
of my breath every time I exhaled. The tips of my fingers felt as though they
were turning numb, so I rubbed them together a couple of times to create heat
from the friction, and placed them deep into the dark cosiness of my open hoody’s
pockets to keep them warm as I left for home.
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